Hindsight, Foresight, and 2013

That dream about bees in October did indeed bring busyness, business, creativity and wealth. Not long after that dream, I got in touch with Todd Reichman over at AMantoFish, who is a legitimate creative business guru, and he sorted me and my business out. Tough love style. Instead of hiring more people, I reorganized my work schedule to take on more work, and better paying projects. Then even better paying projects materialized. For 2013, my goal (Shhh! Don't tell anyone!) is to clear $30,000 after taxes. It's a modest goal, but for a freelance writer just beginning to find her feet, it's where I'm comfortable. Considering what's been happening since October, I'm secretly hoping to overshoot it.

2013

I'm ready for it. 2012 was such a mad-dash year with the engagement, wedding, family drama, wedding blog, podcasting, starting new dream job managing travel bloggers, honeymoon, flubbing being a tour coordinator, constant fear of letting people down, constant guilt for never getting everything done. As 2012 wound to a close this week, I felt exhausted. A pervasive sleepiness that just wouldn't quit. My eyes were open, barely, but my will was still in bed.

But between 12/31 and 1/2, I've felt a surge of focus. Husband and I rearranged our living room drastically, which opened up my mind to new possibilities. Change that we control can be as invigorating as swimming in a lake on a hot day. Change that we don't control, of course, is always terrifying. Sometimes in a good way.

So what does 2013 have in store? My yearly horoscope:

2013: virgo overview
Virgo
2013 brings you sweeping change and intensity, Virgo. The biggest transformation takes place in the realm of the mind. Communication, correspondence and courses of new study carry great importance. Saturn, the cosmic taskmaster, is spending a good chunk of time in the sector of your chart ruling the mental realms and communication. If you're not already a powerful public speaker, teacher or writer, get ready to discover your latent potential to sway the masses with your power of speech! You're also hungry for knowledge in 2013, and will want to strengthen your skill set and beef up your resume with even more knowledge than you possess naturally.
Jupiter continues to bring the potential for great promise and recognition to your career zone this year. Prepare to push all of your projects most strongly during the first half of the year while you have the support of Jupiter. The second half of the year will be better spent socializing and creating community. You'll be more interested in meeting new people than promoting your work. Get ready to meet amazing and passionate folks who will remain in your life for years to come. 

The eclipse patterns stir up endings and new beginnings in relation to siblings, travel and legal issues. Siblings or close relatives could become a source of strain, and you'll have to create firm boundaries. In fact, boundaries in all realms of communication will serve you to avoid overload. Your life is about to become ridiculously busy and filled with more people than you know what to do with. At the end of the day, you're still a hermit at heart and need plenty of alone time, so be sure to carve that out regardless of how social your world becomes.

Oh great, more intensity. Can't help but groan a little there after this last year. But, it looks like the writing business will continue to take off, and then I might even manage a social life. That's one thing I've been wanting: friends. Working from home is a lonely business, though not so lonely as working in an office full of people with whom you have nothing in common (been there, done that, donated the T-shirt). I've been reading "MWF Seeks BFF" about a married late 20-something woman trying to make new friends in Chicago, and the parallels are striking. It's not easy to make friends after college.

The friendship issue has been on the top of my mind lately. I'm coming to the conclusion that my generation is extremely narcissistic. "Fundamental narcissism" is what I've been calling it. The kind of people who can't be bothered to go out of their way to be friends, but who are very happy if you go out of your way for them. Husband and I are just the kind of people who bend over backwards for everyone as a matter of good manners. Recognizing this Fundamental Narcissism it in far too many people I meet has made me deeply appreciate the notable exceptions to the rule. I just wish there were more of them, that they lived closer, and that we could have them over for dinner parties.

Husband and I were watching "Liberal Arts" last night, an independent film starring Ted Mosby (HIMYM), exploring the idea of adulthood after college. One line struck me "People are disappointing." And one of the themes was that the idealism and openness of college gets pummeled out of you by all of these disappointments. What can I say? It *can* be true. Yet I know people for whom it is not true. Some people stubbornly retain their idealism and positive view of humanity. Too bad those people are so damned far away.

If my 2013 horoscope is accurate (and aren't they always?), my island nation of WorkFromHome is soon to be occupied by people other than myself, my husband, and our few far-flung friends. That will be a most welcome change.

But enough of that - We stay positive around here no matter what. Fundamental Optimism is what I call it. My friend and writing partner sent me the best card ever. She writes:

"Truth or Dare? Dare you say? Super! I dare you...
1) To write haiku together on post-it-notes and decorate public bathrooms at a bar.
2) Reach out to someone on Craiglist who is new in town and seems normal but a bit lonely.
Mostly, my lovely friends, I wish you both Brand New moments and fiercely bold living in 2013."

May I wish the same to anyone reading this Chronicle of my Quarter Life Crisis.